Laing’s Letchworth Birthday Party
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6th February 2010
Sawston V Letchworth 2’s
As you all know I pride myself on the accuracy of my match reports. So when our beloved coach James angrily approached me regarding a misquote in my previous match report I felt a bit disappointed in myself. James explained that he did not say that Hertford were “shit” and that I should not have posted that in case they stitch us up next time we play them. I could have sworn that’s what he said so when I asked him what he did say he replied, “I said Hertford were crap, not shit, it’s an important difference”. So here it is, the official retraction. James did not say Hertford were shit, he said they were crap. Apologies to Hertford if any offence was caused, please don’t stitch us up with ringers in the next game.
Anyway that’s enough apologising. With the start of the Six Nations and Jays 21st, Saturday had a bit of a party atmosphere. After dominating Letchworth on their own pitch in December – but attacking with all the menace of a Scottish national team - Sawston wanted to score more points. With focus in training and an excellent result against Hertford last time out, the team felt there was an opportunity to carry on the progress in 2010. Obviously it was never going to be that easy.
Letchworth arrived with a stronger team than they fielded last time out and their performance was vastly improved. Strong forward play and simplistic back play meant that a significant victory for Sawston was never on the cards. They fielded a big South African centre who looked like a cross between Table Mountain and a springbok and an abrasive full back who caught practically everything we threw at him and returned it with interest.
Both teams struggled to break down the opposition, but Sawston enjoyed more territory and were it not for a depressing forward pass on the try line and a couple of other handling errors within 5m - we would have scored at least 2 more tries. As it was we relied on the Laing brothers to get the winning score. A quick tap from Jay and a 230m pass off his weaker hand put Callum over the line in the corner.
Really, as the 8-3 scoreline suggests, it was a forwards dominated game and it is hugely pleasing to see the Sawston pack outplay the larger more experienced Letchworth outfit. With a few changes in the backs it was difficult for them to gel and with the slowest centre pairing in Green King League history, line breaks were as likely as John Terry appearing on Celebrity Wife Swap. More work in training will be required if we are to beat Old Albanians in two weeks time.
Whilst it would be easy to believe that all footballers are wankers (obviously many are), spare a thought for Peter Crouch for his rare moment of humble honesty. When asked what he would be if he wasn’t a premiership footballer, he replied “A virgin”
Final Score 8-3
Team: Pantxoa (which is Basque for “liability when drunk”), Callum, Dan O, H, Martin, Ash, Jay, Pete, Wilf, Timmy, Don, Theo, Vipers, Dan F, Robin.
Subs: Wayne for Dan O, James for Timmy
Tries: Callum
Pens: Pantxoa
Sawston Star Man
It’s a bloody difficult job playing out of position. It’s even more difficult if the position you are playing in is prop and you are normally a flanker. Timmy had a great game against some large and experienced looking opposition forwards. He held his own in the scrums and played like a back row (as obviously he should) in the loose. It’s pretty obvious a player has given his all when, with 5 minutes left, he collapses in the middle of the pitch. Fair play to him, he didn’t have enough energy to walk (diabetic attack) but he still found some to shout expletives at James for not bringing on his sugar. “Get my sugar you fucking idiot” (or similar) he yelped just as his eyes rolled into the back of his head.
A final word of advice for Tim that is also applicable and useful in a number of non-rugby related situations. If someone gives you a job to do that you’d rather not do again – don’t be good at it. It’s like washing up, if you smash a few wine glasses every now and then you are much less likely to be asked to do it!
Coaches Corner
James was tight lipped after the game, in case of any more misquotes, but training is obviously the focus of the next couple of weeks. Datchworth on Saturday will be a very tough game and Old Albanians the week after will essentially define our season.
The small print
This article does not represent the views of Sawston rugby and may not bear any resemblance to real events. It is not intended to offend anyone… actually that’s probably not true as I aim to offend everyone in the club at least once a season. Don’t take it personally though. I do not pretend to comprehend the rules, especially as the new rules are now the old rules and the old, old rules are back again. From time to time I will refer to “scrums” and “rucks” and “mauls” in these reports, but please be assured that I don’t know what these are.
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